Retirement is a significant event in someones life, and a funny retirement card can help them cope with their newfound freedom. Here are some ideas for what to write in a retirement card that will make them laugh:

• "Congratulations on finishing work-life, you lazy-bone!"
• "Retirement is the sweet ending to life."
• "Remember retirement is an adventure! Especially if you count trekking out of bed, climbing on sofas and diving into takeaways. Have fun."
• "Now you’ve finally earned that senior discount, you slacker."
• "Retirement is the world’s longest coffee break!"
• "You’re retired – goodbye tension, hello pension!"
• "Retirement: No job, no stress, no pay!"
• "The best part about being retired is never having to request time off."
• "Children are the leading cause of old age."
• "I love coffee. It’s Redbull for old people."

Remember to keep the recipients sense of humor in mind and avoid anything that could be considered offensive.